25 June 2010

If George W. Bush had...

HOW TO SELL ... TOOTHBRUSHES
The kids filed back into class Monday morning. They were very excited,Their weekend assignment was to sell something, then give a talk on
productive salesmanship.
Little Sally led off, "I sold Girl Scout cookies and I made $30.00," she said proudly, "My sales approach was to appeal to the customer's
civil sprit and I credit that approach for my obvious success."
"Very good," said the teacher.
Little Jenny was next. "I sold magazines," she said, "I made $45.00 and I explained to everyone that magazine's would keep the up on current events."
"Very good Jenny," said the teacher.
Eventually, it was little Johnny's turn. The teacher held her breath. Little Johnny walked up to the front of the classroom and dumped a box full of cash on the teacher's desk. "$2,467.00", he said.
"$2,467.00!", cried the teacher, "What in the world were you selling?"
"Toothbrushes", said little Johnny.
"Toothbrushes", echoed the teacher. "How could you sell enough toothbrushes to make that much money?"
"I found the busiest corner in town", said little Johnny. "I set up a Dip & Chip stand and I gave everybody who walked by a FREE sample."They all said the same thing, "Hey this tastes like dog shit!" Then I would say, "It is dog shit. Wanna buy a toothbrush"? Little Johnny continued, "I used the government approach of giving you something shitty that they say is good, and then making you pay to get the shitty taste out of your mouth."
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If George W. Bush had spent hundreds of thousands of dollars to take Laura Bush to a play in NYC, would you have approved?
If George W Bush had reduced your retirement plan's holdings of GM stock by 90% and given the unions a majority stake in GM, would you have approved?
If George W. Bush had made a joke at the expense of the Special Olympics, would you have approved?
If George W. Bush had given Prime Minister Gordon Brown a set of inexpensive and incorrectly formatted DVDs, when PM Gordon Brown had given him a thoughtful and historically significant gift, would you have approved?
If George W. Bush had given the Queen of England an iPod containing videos of his speeches, would you have thought this embarrassingly narcissistic and tacky?
If George W. Bush had bowed to the King of Saudi Arabia , would you have approved?
If George W. Bush had visited Austria and made reference to the non-existent "Austrian language," would you have brushed it off as a minor slip?
If George W. Bush had filled his cabinet and circle of advisers with people who cannot seem to keep current in their income taxes, would you have approved?
If George W. Bush had stated that there were 57 states in the United States, would you have said that he is clueless.
If George W. Bush would have flown all the way to Denmark to make a five minute speech about how the Olympics would benefit him walking out his front door in Texas, would you have thought he was a self important, conceded, egotistical prick.
If George W. Bush had been so Spanish illiterate as to refer to "Cinco de Quatro" in front of the Mexican ambassador when it was the 5th of May (Cinco de Mayo), and continued to flub it when he tried again, would you have winced in embarrassment?
If George W. Bush had mis-spelled the word "advice" would you have hammered him for it for years like Dan Quayle and potato as proof of what a dunce he is?
If George W. Bush had burned 9,000 gallons of jet fuel to go plant a single tree on Earth Day, would you have concluded he's a hypocrite?
If George W. Bush's administration had okayed Air Force One flying low over millions of people followed by a jet fighter in downtown Manhattan causing widespread panic, would you have wondered whether they actually get what happened on 9-11?
If George W Bush had failed to send relief aid to flood victims throughout the Midwest with more people killed or made homeless than in New Orleans, would you want it made into a major ongoing political issue with claims of racism and incompetence?
If George W. Bush had created the position of 32 Czars who report directly to him, bypassing the House and Senate on much of what is happening in America, would you have approved.
If George W. Bush had ordered the firing of the CEO of a major corporation, even though he had no constitutional authority to do so, would you have approved?
If George W. Bush had proposed to triple the national debt, which had taken more than two centuries to accumulate, in one year, would you have approved?
If George W. Bush had then proposed to triple the debt again within 10 years, would you have approved?
If George W. Bush had called this a Muslim nation, would you have approved?
So, tell me again, what is it about Obama that makes him so brilliant and impressive? Can't think of anything? Don't worry. He's done all this in 10 months -- so you'll have three years and two months to come up with an answer.
Remember in the early days of the campaign, Oboma stated that we should be a multi-language nation to be able to converse with other?
Guess who knows and speaks more foreign languages than Oboma, yes, it is George W. Bush.